numberblocksfandomcom-20200223-history
User blog:TSRITW/TDR Episode 1: The Beginning of Everything
This episode of TDR is sponsored by nothing. 'CHAPTER 0: Before Intro' *TSRITW: Well, this is it. *Chris (TD): Can't believe you spent 1000000 infinidollars to pay for this. *TSRITW: Yup... another infinity world. Man, those things are expensive. *Announcer: Why do you have to buy a second infinity world, rectangle? *TSRITW: Because my first one... IS THE PRIZE. *TSRITW: 310 contestants, one huge prize. I'm Rectangl'r, and welcome to You Don't Know Total Battle for Charlie and the Numtumb3rjocks Fighters Symbols Alpha Horror Factory Busters! *TSRITW: ...then again, why can't we just call it Total Drama Rewind? INTRO 'CHAPTER 1: After Intro' *TSRITW: Yes, yes, YES! ALL THREE HUNDRED AND TEN CONTESTANTS ARE HERE! *Chris (TIQ): Mreow? *TSRITW: Chris, you're a contestant here. *Chris (TD): ANOTHER CHRIS? What's next, another Charlie? *Both Charlies: Yup. *Chris (TD): At least there's no one here named Chip. *Chip: You were saying? *Chris (TD): Man, this is confusing. Also, just like in Total Drama World Tour, you'll have to SING! *All contestants: WHAT!? *Duncan: Duncans do NOT sing. *Courtney: But Courtneys do! *JellyGelly: So do Jellies! *TSRITW: He's just kidding. *Duncan: Thank gosh. *Octo: Something tells me this is a reality show. *Four (BFB): It's just another one of these object show things, except... *Cuatro: ...IT'S TSRITW'S VERSION! *TSRITW: Yup! *Golf: Okay, so what are we gonna do? *TSRITW: Well, this show is called Total Drama Rewind, right? *Gwen and Owen: WE DIDN'T KNOW THAT!! *TSRITW: Why? *Heather and Flower: That intro you played, like, a minute ago? *TSRITW: Oh, right. No logo. Anyway, this show is about REVERSING EVERYTHING YOU'VE DONE! *Max and Quatro: WHAT!? *TSRITW: Only joking. But still, we're gonna go to where-used-to-be-Camp Whateverthenameis! *Chris (TD) and KoolGal: You mean Camp Wawanakwa? *TSRITW: Oh, fine. *Topher: Why can't we just go to Pahkitew Island? *TSRITW: It no longer exists. FLASHBACK *Professor Quigley: So... this is where we place the bomb? *TSRITW: Yup. And 3... 2... 1... *(Quigley and TSRITW escape via a portal while Pahkitew Island gets sucked into another portal) OF FLASHBACK *TSRITW: It should appear here sometime. Also, your name is Topher, so... Chris... Topher... CHRISTOPHER!? *Jack Inthebox: Mind BLOWN. (literally explodes from the inside while remaining intact) *Amy: I want to GET RID OF THOSE ONES! *Samey: Which ones? *Amy: Those two ones? *Al: You mean us? *Evan: We're just counted as one contestant. *(everyone is transported to where-used-to-be-Camp Wawanakwa) 'CHAPTER 2: Return to the Island' *Book: Wait, what's the thing we're all battling for? *Tennis Ball: Let me guess, Dream Island? *Beth: OR IS IT ONE MILLION DOLLARS?? *TSRITW: No. It's my FIRST infinite world! *(everyone gasps) *TSRITW: Yup. It's an infinite-cube kilometer of paradise, a five-BAJILLION-star hotel, SEVEN HUNDRED AND SEVENTY-SEVEN casinos, SIX GORGONZILLION restaurants, robot servants that NEVER malfunction, and the owner can decide who gets to come in and who doesn't! *Eraser: So... how much does it cost? *TSRITW: Depends on how much I spent on the things I owned. *Golf Ball: Can we please start the next challenge? *TSRITW: Oh, right. CHRIS? *Chris (TIQ): ? *TSRITW: No, not you. The OTHER Chris. *Chris (TD): (ahem) This challenge is a DisOrDat challenge. You have the choice to either A. unsink Camp Wawanakwa or B. fix the Total Drama Jumbo Jet. *Chris (TD): Wait, wait, wait, that blue window just explained what I said! *TSRITW: It's just something we're gonna do for the rest of the season. *Chris (TD): Thank gosh. *TSRITW: The next season will have a GREEN window! *Chris (TD): NO! *Sam: Wait, why do we have to reconstruct it? *Gwen: Yeah, I’d rather have it stay destroyed. *TSRITW: Well, was the theatre from Sing reconstructed after its collapse? *DJ and Leshawna: Yeah? *TSRITW: Was the Lego factory rebuilt even after two fires? *Lindsay and Beth: Yeah? *TSRITW: That is correct! While some actions are not reversible (without changing the direction of time somehow), such as the Titanic sinkage or the Hindenburg crash, many others can. All you need are time, effort, and maybe some supernatural powers. *Blitzy: Whatevs. *TSRITW: Okay, ready... set... FIX! 'CHAPTER 3: Start the Challenge!' *Match: FreeSmarters, what's our plan? *Pencil: Make sure that Katie and Sadie are close together, but not Lamey and Samey. *Amy: DID YOU JUST CALL ME "LAMEY"? *Geoff and Bridgette: (start kissing each other) *Romeo and Juliet: (start doing the same thing) *Elastimonkey: HOW ARE WE SUPPOSED TO UNSINK AN ISLAND!? *Road Killer: I don’t know everything! *Holiver: Let’s ask a host! I mean, (pointing at Blitzy) Blitzy’s doing it! *Blitzy: Umm... TSRITW? *TSRITW: Yes, Blitzy? *Blitzy: How far it is from here to the TDJJ? *Chris (TD): That's like saying how far it is between Alberta and Muskoka. *Jack Inthebox: 3386.9 km. Here are the directions: starting from Alberta, head west for 7.9 km, turn left, walk for 3.9 km... (fast forward for the sake of time) ...turn right, 210 m, and you'll arrive at the Muskoka District Municipality, Ontario, Canada. *Blitzy: (is already heading for Drumheller) *Jack Inthebox: I guess he's going for it. I mean, he IS a traveler. *Holiver: Jack, how do you unsink an island? *Jack Inthebox: That’s for you to know. *Holiver: (starts cranking Jack) *Jack Inthebox: WAIT, WHAT ARE YOU DOING!? *Holiver: I NEED ANSWERS!!!!!!!!!!! *Lindsay: Wow, I didn’t know H''oliver could go full Eva! *Holiver: DON’T PRONOUNCE THE SILENT H!!!! 000 *TSRITW: Oh, and have I mentioned that you can make your own confessionals here? *Courtney: Hey, where did you get this? *TSRITW: From another show. Some re-assembly required. 001 *Courtney: I can’t believe I got to make the first confessional! *Heather: (offscreen) Actually, this is the second confessional. *Courtney: WHAT DO YOU MEAN? THE SCREEN CLEARLY SAID “001”! *Heather: (offscreen) The counter starts at zero. *Nada: DID SOMEBODY SAY ZERO? *Holiver: HEY! A REALLY MAD HOURGLASS IS APPROACHING! 002 *Holiver: You do NOT pronounce the silent H in my name. It’s just WRONG. 003 *Tad: Is it just me, or does this confessional chair remind me of something? TO THE SHOW *Blitzy: (is speeding across Canada and made it to the TDJJ) Wow. I didn’t know I had a great sense of direction. 004 *Blitzy: (haha) I’m just kidding. I do know that I have a great sense of direction. I mean, I’ve gone on world tours! And not the musical season kind. TO THE SHOW *Blitzy: (sees how large the TDJJ is) This could take forever. *Octo: Never fear! OCTOBLOCK IS HERE! *Xrossman: So is X! *Blitzy: Wait, aren’t there four X’s in this show? *Xrossman: (thinks of LeapFrog X, X-Ray, and Mr. X) Oh, right. 005 *Xrossman: This is utter IDIOCY. THERE CAN BE ONLY ONE X, AND THAT IS ME! *TSRITW: Oh, and stop hogging the confessional booth. This camera can only hold a thousand confessionals. *Xrossman: So what? That’s a large number! *TSRITW: There are 310 contestants on this show and every thousandth confessional we have to upload all thousand confessionals onto the computer. During the process, you can’t make any confessionals. *Xrossman: Didn’t know that. TO THE SHOW *Xrossman: I know! I’ll just get Flyor and Igorr! *Blitzy: Be careful, though. They’re, like, three thousand kilometers away from us. *Xrossman: ...never mind. *(meanwhile, on the platform next to where Camp Wawanakwa was) *Mike: I used to have multiple identities... *Zulu: I STILL HAVE MINE! *Leonard: AHHHHHH! A ZOMBIE! MUST GET RID OF ZOMBIE WITH- *Golf: (pushes Leonard into the water) Seriously? *Gelatin: Hey, let's use Spongy to soak up all the water! *Cameron: Actually, considering the size of Spongy... *Harold: ...and also the fact that the surrounding water is connected to the ocean... *Alpha: ...it's pretty obvious to tell that... *Cameron, Harold, and Alpha: ...HE CANNOT ABSORB ALL OF THE WATER. *Announcer: Yes. In fact, you're supposed to increase the altitude of the island, not lower the sea level. That's just stupid. *Gelatin: (throws Announcer into the water) *Road Killer: (attempts to save Announcer with a tidal wave, only to make it worse) Dang it. I forgot that he's a speaker box. *TSRITW: It's okay, I got this. (dispels Announcer) *Everyone on the platform: (gasps) *TSRITW: What? I can do that. I'm a host. *Chris (TD): Than why can't I do it? *TSRITW: Rectangl'r logic. *Ezekiel: (tackles both Chrises, only to be dispelled by TSRITW) What? *TSRITW: You were devolutionized in TDWT, so I fixed you up. Oh, and also all of the RotI contestants. (dispels the RotI contestants) *X (BFB): Uh... guys? Why can't we help those contestants unsink the island? *Four (BFB): NOBODY CARES. *Quatro: Totally agree. 006 *X (BFB): I just wanna help out in the show. TO THE SHOW *Mr. Websley: Hey guys, what are you doing!? *Lily: (is seen throwing LeapFrog C into the water) What? It was Tad's idea. *Tad: Umm... *Mr. Websley: (grabs Tad and throws him into the water) GO FETCH HIM BACK, YOU AMPHIBIAN!!! *Heather: Woah. *Beth: Umm... gals? that green ghost and number three are making a plant base or something! *Ivy: Is this enough? *3ree: No. KEEP GROWING THE PLANTS! MORE OF THESE CAN LIFT THE ISLAND! *(meanwhile, in Drumheller) *Blitzy: WHY DOES IT HAVE TO BE SO BIG!? *Octo: So what? It's a jumbo jet. And you're fast. You're not supposed to complain about things like that. *Blitzy: (sighs) Fine. (starts fixing the bottom half of the TDJJ) *Octo: Man, he's good. *(back in ex-Camp Wawanakwa) *3ree: We need more plant power. *Elastimonkey: I have plant powers, so maybe that can help. *(eventually Ivy, 3ree, and Elastimonkey made the island rise back into its former glory) *TSRITW: Nice job, greenies. The thing is... the island's still kinda a wreck. You deal with what's above the island while I stabilize the base. *Lindsay: What does "stabilize" mean? *(Drumheller) *Blitzy: I... think it's fixed. *Octo: Yeah, let's test it out. *Blitzy: I'm gonna drive 'cause I have a pilot's licence. *Xrossman: You have a pilot's licence? *Blitzy: So what? *(they all ride the TDJJ to get back to Camp Wawanakwa) *TSRITW: Also, you see that runway over there? *Duncan: I see it, so why did you put one there? *Chris (TD): FOR THE PLANE, DOOFUS! *Duncan: DID YOU JUST CALL ME DOOFUS!? (throws Chris (TD) into the water) *Chris (TD): DARN IT! THIS IS NOT THE SEASON FINALE! YOU CAN'T DO THIS TO ME! *(the TDJJ lands on the runway) *Blitzy: WE'RE BACK! *Octo: Finally. *Xrossman: I mean, how long is this episode, anyway? *TSRITW: Okay. I think we're done with the stabilizers. How's it goin' up there? *Road Killer: Ehh. *Blitzy: Did you know that I can ride a bike on my head? *Bridgette: Well, I can hold a handstand for twenty minutes! *Holiver: You know, I could unsink the Titanic and uncrash the Hindenburg. *Lindsay and Beth: :O *Holiver: What? *TSRITW: Anyway, now that pretty much everything's back to normal, WHO WANTS A BONUS!?? *Everyone: (each saying "me" repeatedly) *TSRITW: Well... just close your eyes and enter a deep sleep. Yes, all of you, enter rapid-eye movement! You'll see. YOU'LL ALL SEE. *(approximately 90 minutes later) 'CHAPTER 4: Even More Cliff Diving' *TSRITW: Wake up, guys! If you want a bonus, you gotta jump from this cliff like the second episode of ''Total Drama Island! *Everyone: (gasps) *Punch: WHAT!? *Arif: Rectangl'r, I don't think this is a good idea. *Jay (LBWH): I can float down! *Jay (Alphablocks): So can I! *TSRITW: But you can't have any protection, so no floating down, no adamantium... *Blitzy: Actually, I have a confession. *Octo: What? *Blitzy: The thing is... this collar is the source of my power. *Road Killer: Woah. *Blitzy: Yeah, so... I'M GONNA JUMP OFF THAT CLIFF. (takes off collar and gives it to Octo) Tell my story if I actually die. *TSRITW: We'll recover you nevertheless. *Blitzy: Really? *TSRITW: N- ...I mean yes! Totally yes! *Blitzy: (sighs) I'm gonna die now. I'm gonna FRIKKIN' die now. *Chris (TD): Careful there. American censors just pricked up their ears. *Blitzy: Welp, I'm 21. I'm probably going to break every single bone in my body. (proceeds to fall backwards and off the edge) 'TO BE CONTINUED.' *Tryplo: I hate cliffhangers. *TSRITW and Chris (TD): Tune in next time on TOTAL. DRAMA. REWIND!!!!!!!!!! Category:Blog posts Category:TDR